Back in Your Life
by marysunshine81
Summary: By the time Kurt comes back, Diane's life has significantly changed. She has left L/G and became a judge. But do they still have feelings for each other? A McHart story with some Diane-Will moments and an M rated epilogue.
1. Chapter One: Unforgettable Memories

Timeline: 3 years after Silver Bullet

Disclaimer: Diane, Kurt and Will belong to the writers of TGW and CBS, the original character is mine

Note: Here I go with another multichap. I'm really excited to finally post this. It has been sitting on my computer way too long and I've been trying to figure out what to change in it, what to add, but I couldn't really change anything, so I decided to consider it finished and start posting it. It has 13 chapters, some are shorter others are longer. It may be a bit out of character at times, but I tried to find good enough reasons for that. I really hope you'll enjoy reading this story!

Reviews are always appreciated! :)

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><p><strong>Chapter One<strong>**: Unforgettable Memories**

„Hey," the sound of a familiar voice made her shake a little. She hadn't heard this voice, _his _voice for a long time, but she still remembered it, remembered _him_. That single word started to bring back memories all at once, memories she'd thought she had forgotten long ago. This unexpected encounter already puzzled her. It took her a while until she got her act back together and finally looked into those all too familiar eyes, regretting it the next moment.

"Hey," she replied, trying to sound casual, but she was feeling uncomfortable.

They both remained silent, looking into each other's eyes for a short moment. She tried to think of something to say, but her mind was focusing on the memories that flooded it just a minute ago. Their first meeting in her office when he'd told her he hadn't liked Chicago, then the night when he'd told her he'd wanted to go away to Costa Rica. What was he doing in Chicago again? And what was he doing talking to her in front of the court house? Why didn't he just walk past her? If it hadn't been for him she wouldn't have noticed him.

"What are you doing here?" she asked to break the silence and in fact she was curious to know why he was there, when he'd told her he would have left. She thought he wouldn't have come back, their last goodbye had seemed final to her, he had been determined to go and she hadn't been ready to go with him.

"Working."

He said the word so easily, like it had been the most natural thing in the world for him.

"Good, " she said nodding slightly and she had no idea what else to say.

"I wanted to congratulate you, I heard that you've become a judge."

"Thank you," she said automatically, thinking of what it could have meant he seemed to be so well informed about her, while she was surprised to even see him in town again.

"You deserve it," he continued and she actually had to bow her head down a little to hide her face from him for just a moment. Why was he so nice to her? She basically rejected his proposal the last time they met. Even if it had happened almost three years before, that night still remained a bitter memory for her, a memory she hadn't been able to forget, but apparently it was different for him.

"I have to go now," she said quickly lifting her head again. She didn't say it because she wanted to get rid of him, she really had to go, her first trial of the day was about to start in a few minutes. But she actually became curious about why he had stopped her, why he wanted to talk, why he was so well informed about her career. With this move he clearly showed her that he didn't have hard feelings towards her and she obviously had no reason to feel differently towards him. She wished to continue this conversation with him, some other time, when she would have been prepared.

"It was good to see you," he replied smiling and his smile made her smile.

"Maybe we could get together for a coffee one of these days?" she asked and her question obviously caught him off guard. He looked away for a short minute, then looked back into her eyes again.

"I…I'm sort of seeing someone."

It wasn't the answer she'd wanted to hear and not because it made her uncomfortable again, but it also wasn't how she'd meant that offer. She thought they could probably meet as just friends, talking about the last years, something they'd barely done when they had been dating. So much had changed in her life and she somehow found herself wishing to talk about it with him, with someone who knew her, but also saw her from a different point of view. But his reply suggested that her intentions hadn't been all that clear to him.

"I…I thought we could just…never mind. It was good to see you too," she said and smiled at him for a second time before walking away.

She was glad they had met, she was glad they had talked, she was glad it had all gone so smoothly. Still seeing him again unsettled her. He wasn't away any more, he was back and he was with another woman. Right after he'd left her she used to think about what she should have done differently, had she wanted to keep him. Despite their differences they had still fit on some levels which could have been enough for an actual relationship, maybe even for a long lasting one. They still ended up going on separate ways, but their paths crossed again that day and she couldn't help asking herself what if…


	2. Chapter Two: Lonely Years

**Chapter Two: Lonely Years**

_Maybe we could get together for a coffee one of these days?_ This question had been haunting him for a week, but during the last day all he could think of was this one sentence. They'd met a week before, when her question had surprised him, and he'd rushed to make it clear that he was actually in kind of a relationship at that moment. He wasn't sure why she'd wanted to meet him later, but he hadn't wanted any misunderstandings between them. He'd thought it'd been for the better.

He'd arrived back to Chicago only a few weeks before. Actually he'd never intended to come back, but life had arranged it in a different way. Chicago had been the past for him, something he'd forgotten about and started a different life. He'd d travelled around the continent, spent time with family and old friends, tried to enjoy his life without work. He'd thought he'd finally deserved this freedom, he'd worked hard for it.

He could have lost almost everything he'd ever owned if it hadn't been for Diane, he was still grateful to her and had long forgiven her for rejecting his proposal. He'd actually taken the time to think about her reasons too. Just because he'd wanted to change his life he couldn't have forced her into doing the same. She loved that life, he used to love that life too and found himself missing it after a while. Doing nothing hadn't exactly been his thing, especially since he couldn't share his life with anyone, except for his friends and family. But he'd become lonely throughout the years and he hadn't liked being lonely. Work had always comforted him for lonely periods, but it had been different without.

After a while he'd found himself looking for someone, someone to share his life with. He'd gone up to women from time to time, tried to get to know them, using the old tricks, but those apparently hadn't worked any more or he'd just simply been unlucky. After some months of trying he'd realised how desperate he'd been and stopped searching, and only a few weeks later he seemed to find someone nevertheless.

He'd met her accidentally at the airport in Denver where he'd gone to visit his friend from high school. He'd been about to get in a cab when he'd seen a woman running towards the vehicle. He'd looked around, but hadn't seen any other taxis around any more, he'd wanted to get into the last one. She'd apologized and explained that she'd been late from an important conference and she'd asked whether they could share the taxi and he hadn't mind. They'd begun to talk inside the car and when they'd dropped her off at her destination she'd given him her number.

That was how it had started and they'd actually dined together the next night. She was a business woman, with her own advertising agency, she'd inherited from her father. She also had two grown-up sons and an ex-husband. She'd shared all these information with him on that first night, and he'd found her talkative nature quite appealing. In addition to that she was also funny, not to mention attractive. He'd found himself falling for her after those two times they met, so when it had actually turned out she was from Chicago, the city he'd managed to forget about, it had already been too late.

She'd had to leave Denver after a few days and since they'd seemed to have started something there, she'd hoped to see him again in Chicago. He'd told her about his life in general, but since she hadn't mentioned her home town, he hadn't mentioned it either. But it had turned out she was living in a city he'd wished not to see again. This fact had made him think about the last few years, when he'd kind of done nothing with his life. He'd realised that he'd needed the normality again, going back to work, living his old life, the life that he used to love.

He'd decided to be honest with her and told her about the trial that had made him leave the city and his profession, but he'd told her that maybe a visit to his past would do him good and he'd wanted to see her again. He'd promised her he'd call her soon and visit and indeed he had. And after he'd arrived back to Chicago he'd also started thinking about going back to work and a few weeks later he'd already been dealing with a new case like before. He and Lilian had continued what they'd started in Denver, going out, having dinner, getting to know each other and it had gone quite well until the day he'd happened to bump into Diane Lockhart.

He'd heard about her leaving her firm and becoming a judge. He'd thought she'd have never left her firm, he'd been wrong. He'd kept himself wondering what changes it could have meant for her life. She was someone special for him, someone he'd wanted to spend the rest of his life with. He cared about her, wanted her to find happiness and he hoped she managed to find it in her new job.

But the previous day – a week after they'd accidentally met at the court house – he'd found a reason to believe Diane wasn't indeed happy with her life. He wasn't sure, he didn't know her that well, but he'd seen her sitting alone in a coffee shop from the window and somehow he had a feeling that she'd been lonely. He knew that feeling too well himself.

Seeing her there he'd started to regret that he'd turned down her offer to meet. They could have met as friends and probably Diane had meant her offer exactly that way, he shouldn't have brushed her off so easily. He'd been thinking about going into the shop at once, but he hadn't been entirely sure in his decision yet, besides he hadn't wanted to surprise her again. He wanted them to be equals when they meet again, so they both could be prepared.

He spent the next day wondering if he was planning to do the right thing. He wasn't sure they could really meet as friends. The physical attraction was something they had never been able to control when they'd been together. But he wasn't free anymore and it gave him sort of a safety. He really liked Lilian and he wasn't the kind of man to hurt a woman's feelings. Their relationship or whatever it had been with Diane belonged to the past and this unexplainable desire he felt to meet her again was also different than before. She was someone he still truly cared for and maybe he was wrong, but he kind of felt that she needed him in a certain way. She'd suggested the meeting and it was actually the least he could do for her, considering what she'd done for him. He didn't feel like he owed her this, it was more of something he wished to do for her and deciding that he would actually do it made him feel better already.


	3. Chapter Three: Why not?

**Chapter Three****: Why not?**

She was walking towards her car when her cell phone started to ring. She had to search her handbag for it and when she finally found it she didn't have much time to waste, she didn't want the caller to think she ignored him, so she answered the phone quickly before she could think otherwise.

"Hallo?" she said automatically, even though she was aware of the caller's identity, but they hadn't talked on the phone for a long time.

"Hey, I was hoping you still have the same number."

"I do," she said and the insecurity in his voice made her smile. He sounded more insecure than a week before when they'd met, even though it had again been him who had initiated the conversation.

"I've been thinking about your suggestion, you know the coffee?"

"Yes," she was glad he made it easy for her with the question, he had to do all the heavy lifting.

"I didn't mean to brush you off with my statement."

He paused and now that she found out the reason for his call she thought it was time for her to make the conversation a bit easier for him.

"Does this mean you've changed your mind about coffee?"

She heard him chuckle at the other end of the line.

"Yes, I mean, why not?"

"Okay," she replied without any hesitation, then she had to think of someone, "But only if it won't cause any trouble with your…" she paused because she wasn't sure how to address the other woman.

"It won't," he replied quickly.

"I'll have to check my schedule first. Can I call you back tomorrow?"

"Sure. You know, I'm actually glad we're doing this."

"Me too," she said smiling, even though she knew he couldn't see him.

"Good night."

"Good night."

She got into her car and sat there for a few minutes before she started the engine. She was surprised he'd called, that he'd changed his mind. After their last conversation she'd thought they might never talk again. She was glad he'd found someone who hopefully made him happy and she could understand why he wouldn't want another woman stand in the way. But apparently something had changed during the last week and she actually became curious to know what had happened.

She wasn't entirely sure it had been a good idea to suggest and agree to this meeting, but she'd actually had nothing to lose. He was someone from her past who'd left a hole behind, that no one had managed to fill in ever since, not for a longer time anyway. But she didn't look at him the same way any more, she knew she had no right to do that, it wouldn't have been fair for several reasons. She'd already said no to him once and he belonged to someone else now. But she trusted herself enough to believe there would be no danger in meeting him casually, that they would both be able to handle this situation properly and bring out the best of it.


	4. Chapter Four: Coffee and Cake

**Chapter Four****: Coffee and Cake**

She was there a few minutes earlier, chose a table for them in a private corner and waited. She somehow had the feeling that she was doing something in secret, something not exactly right, but she decided not to listen. She'd had three days to prepare herself for this meeting and she'd even planned what she was going to wear, making sure it was nothing too provocative. She'd wanted to prove herself right, she'd wanted this to work, but the harder she'd tried the more doubts she'd had that she'd fail. She'd even thought of cancelling the whole thing last minute, and it was really unlike her. She'd handled thousands of meetings in her life, why should this one have been different?

Because he was Kurt McVeigh. If the man hadn't left her she would probably have seriously fallen in love with him. For a short time she'd even considered leaving her life behind and going away with him, that had been the effect he'd had on her and that was why she should have stayed away from him. But she didn't want him to know how she felt, she didn't want to seem unable to handle this new situation between them. She decided to let his behaviour guide her and could only hope she wouldn't regret this afterwards.

After he'd arrived, they ordered coffee and he insisted that they ate some dessert as well. And of course they started with their usual political implications, which gave the conversation a familiar tone. By the time their order arrived she managed to calm down enough to start enjoying the situation. There was no awkwardness between them any more, like the last time or at the beginning of the phone call. They were both prepared, they knew why they were there, there were no misunderstandings. She tried her best to handle him as an old friend and with each passing minute she felt better in his company.

She told him how she'd decided to run for a judgeship and what changes it had caused in her life. He told her where he'd spent the last 3 years, but he didn't say a word about the other woman. She didn't want that subject to cause awkwardness between them again, so she decided to take it easy and ask him openly about her.

"Tell me about her. How long have you been together?"

"You really want to discuss her?"

"Sure. Is there a reason we shouldn't talk about her?"

"No," he said, smiling a little, "Her name is Lilian and she has an advertising agency. She's divorced and has two sons, they're in college. We met three months ago and she is the reason I came back to Chicago. Is there anything else you want to know?"

The fact that he openly admitted that Lilian had been the reason for his comeback while she had been there all the time, kind of hurt her. Of course she'd understood that he'd wanted to leave back then, but for a while she'd actually wished he would have come back to her. She'd never gone as far as asking him to do so though, when it had still been a possibility. It wasn't any more. She had no right to ask anything from him now, she had to let him be happy with the woman he'd chosen.

"Do you live together?" she already regretted this question after saying it out loud, but she really wanted to know how serious their relationship was.

"No, I moved into my old place and she has the boys."

"They don't like you?" she asked when she saw his telling look.

"Let's just say we haven't had the chance to get to know each other yet."

"I'm sure they'll come around, it's impossible not to like you," she said then she felt like adding, "I mean you are a likeable a person, you…" she started to feel embarrassed and decided not to continue this line of thoughts.

He just smiled at her and for a moment she thought the awkwardness would come back again, when he surprised him with his words.

"Now that we've covered my love life, it's your turn."

"My turn?" she asked widening her eyes.

"Yep. Are you seeing someone?"

"No," she replied quickly, thinking this would satisfy him and they could move on to another subject.

"I thought with this new job you'd have more time for yourself."

"I kind of do, but you know me, I can never just sit around, I'm trying to make the best of it."

"I just hope that you are happy."

He said in a tone that touched her heart and she had to break the eye contact with him for a while before she replied.

"Yes, I am happy," she said, but she wasn't sure she was telling the truth.

Seeing him again, seeing him happy made her realise that something was still missing from her life. She had the career she'd dreamed of but now she had no one to share her success with. At least at the firm she'd had Will. They'd had a complicated relationship most of the time, but throughout the years they'd become good friends and shared hundreds of wins and defeats. But she was on her own now.

"Diane?" his voice startled her a little, she had gotten lost in her thoughts too much.

"Yes?"

"Are you all right?"

"Yes," she said firmly and started to smile.

There was a minute of silence, while both of them finished their cakes and coffees.

"Maybe we can repeat this sometime," he suggested.

"I'd love that," she said, smiling at him again. For a moment she managed to forget about everything else and just got lost in his eyes, but then she quickly added: "And I'd love to hear about you getting to know Lilian's sons. You can't honestly fear two college boys."

"I don't fear them," he replied chuckling. "You know what, I promise I'll try to get closer to them but you also have to promise me something."

"What?"

"You should…" he paused.

"What? Tell me! What should I do?"

"Forget it, I just really want you to be happy."

"Don't worry about me," she said seriously, looking into his eyes.

He didn't have to finish the sentence for her to know what he'd meant. He probably wanted to tell her to find someone, to start dating. Maybe it was time for her to do it again, her last relationship hadn't lasted long, and it had ended before she'd made these changes in her life. But she hadn't felt the loneliness before he came back to remind her of what could have been. He'd managed to turn her world upside down again in one week, but she still didn't mind letting him into her life again. And even though she wasn't entirely confident in handling his presence yet, she was sure she wanted him to stay.


	5. Chapter Five: Your Honour

**Chapter Five****: Your Honour**

It'd been a year since she'd finally reached what she'd set as her life's goal from her early years. Being a judge was the crown of the legal profession and after years of fighting to get to the top she was finally there.

_The Honourab__le Judge Diane Lockhart presiding. _She'd never forget the day she'd first heard this sentence, when she'd entered _her _courtroom for the first time. It had been one of the happiest moments of her life. But her satisfaction hadn't lasted long, soon she'd had to learn the downsides of her decision. Being a judge was an honour, but at the beginning she'd been far from feeling it that way.

She'd had her years of experience on the other side of the bench, but getting to this side had meant leaving that all behind. She had other rules to play by, her hands were more tied, she didn't have the same freedom any more. As a lawyer all she'd had to care about had been the interest of her client and the firm, making sure not to cross the borders of legality and ethics. As a judge she had to serve justice, had to look at the cases from a different point of view, trying to see behind the facts and the masquerade of the lawyers that she knew too well.

It should have been easier for her since she didn't have to worry about a firm, to go after money, to care about employees. She was an officer of the state, with a salary, a staff and her own territory. She had responsibilities, but they were different. She'd needed a change in her life, to get to another stage in her career and there was no way back. But she couldn't help missing the life she'd left behind, where she'd been her own boss and that of several other people and she'd had a firm that had been like a child to her, the child she'd never had.

It'd been harder than she'd thought to get used to this difference in her life, although in the first few months she hadn't had much time to actually think about it. Getting started had kept her busy day and night, it had taken her a while to actually feel comfortable on that bench both professionally and personally. But sitting in her office after a tiring day didn't give her that much comfort any more as it used to when she'd had her own office in a building not so far away from there. The chambers of the courthouse were different, they didn't feel like home at all.

A knock on her door interrupted her line of thoughts and she was surprised to see an all too familiar face when it opened.

"Your Honour, can I see you for a moment?" he smiled and she smiled back at him.

"I told you, any time."

She missed the old days when they'd shared a drink at the end of the day. She missed the little moments of happiness after winning an important case or some other battle. She even missed fighting with him. Throughout the years they'd come close to each other and she couldn't help missing him from her life.

"Actually, I wanted to ask you out, " he said in such a serious tone that it took her a few seconds until she started laughing.

"I'm serious, I need a plus one and I thought you love these things, so why not go together?"

"What happened to your plus one?" she asked still chuckling.

"She's out of town and Sharon hates when there's an empty seat at the table, she takes after you in that regard."

"At least you have something to remember me by."

"Not that I'd need any reminder," he smiled.

"I might start thinking you really want to go out with me," she replied, still laughing.

"I really want to go out with you," he repeated in the same tone.

"So what's this event?" she asked when she was finally able to stop laughing.

"C.H…R…something. Honestly? I have no idea. You know how much I care about these things."

"So when and where?"

"Does this mean you're coming?"

"Why not? For old time's sake, I'm sure it will be fun."

"At least one of us is. It's next week, I'll call you about the details. I just wanted to ask you in person."

"You really should visit me more often."

She said, ignoring how this might have sounded from her mouth. She knew Will was busy enough with work and his actual girlfriend to find time for her. But she really appreciated his gesture with the invitation. He couldn't have known how much it meant to her, especially in these days, when loneliness started to take over her life.

"I miss you too," he said honestly, smiling at her for a short while, "I'll pick you up before the party," he added and left.

She looked at the closed door and for a short moment she wished she could make the last year disappear and find herself back in her office at Lockahrt&Gardner again. It lasted only for a moment, but this thought again proved that something was missing from her life.


	6. Chapter Six: Small World

**Chapter Six: Small World**

"Diane?"

Hearing his voice, she barely believed her own ears. She had no idea what on earth would he be doing on an event like this, but she couldn't mistake his voice for anyone else's. She turned in his direction and smiled to the best of her ability, but her smile actually froze when she spotted the woman on his side. Her hair was blonder, she was also younger and beautiful in her dark blue dress, that showed her slim figure. Not that she had a reason to hide in her tight red dress, that fitted her perfectly and it was actually ironic how she had to meet him again wearing that after she'd been so careful to choose something harmless the last time they'd met.

"It's a small world," she said, still smiling, shifting her look from one to the other.

"Lilian, let me introduce Diane Lockhart, she is a friend of mine."

Diane suppressed an eye roll hearing those last words.

"Diane, this is Lilian Parker, my date."

The two women shook hands.

"It's nice to meet you," said the younger woman with a smile.

"It's nice to meet you too. Kurt told me so much about you," Diane started but Kurt did actually roll his eyes hearing this, so she already regretted the sentence.

"He never mentioned you to me," Lilian looked in Kurt's direction, who quickly took a sip from his drink.

"He has so many friends in Chicago and I might not be someone he's proud of. I'm a democrat you know."

Kurt obviously took the wrong moment to swallow his drink, he ended up coughing which drew Lilian's attention from Diane back to him.

"Are you all right, honey?"

"Yes, I'm fine, I just need a little fresh air. Do you mind if we take a walk outside?"

"But I was just about to get to know your friend."

"You can continue it later, this will be a long night. It was nice to see you, Diane," he said and gently pulled his date in the direction of the door.

"Bye," she said with an apologizing look before turning away.

"Was that Kurt McVeigh?" Will asked right after the pair left through the door.

"Yep," she replied, still looking in their direction.

"Is he back in town? I thought he'd left."

"He's back."

"I might need him for one of our cases."

"Call him."

"You know you never told me what happened between you two back then."

"I rejected his proposal," she replied casually turning to him. She had no reason to keep this in secret from him any more.

"You did what?"

"I won't say it again," she smiled.

"And now he's with someone else."

"Yep."

"Scotch?"

"Thanks," she took the glass and drank it out in one move.

She wasn't ready for this. She'd barely had time to get used to the idea of Kurt's comeback and now she had to see him with the other woman. Knowing that he was with someone else and actually seeing them together was different. She knew she had no right to be jealous, but she still couldn't help this feeling spreading through her, burning her just like the drink did.

Suddenly it hit her that she couldn't accept the fact that he'd come back to the city because of another woman, it just didn't make sense. He'd never really given them a chance, leaving had been the easy way out for him. They used to be so good together, he shouldn't have left her just like that, just because she'd said no to running away. She started to get angry with him for doing this to her, for creating this impossible situation where she was the odd one out. She deserved better than that.

"I think I need a little fresh air too."

"Are you sure you want to go after them?" Will's voice was clearly worried.

She didn't plan to follow them, she just didn't feel like staying inside the room where too many people she knew could have witnessed her unpredictable behaviour. The feeling of jealousy mixed with anger was too much to hide, especially with the drinks she'd consumed that night. She needed to get out of there.

"I suppose the garden is big enough for the three of us."

"You want company?"

"No, but if you could somehow distract _his_ company, I'd be eternally grateful."

She knew she should have avoided them and she wanted to, but at the same time she felt like confronting Kurt. She didn't know exactly what she would have told him, but it surely wouldn't have been that nice as their conversation the other day.

"You mean it?" he asked, obviously not taking her seriously, but on the same time he looked ready to do it for her if she insisted.

She smiled at him then gave him back the empty glass, changing it to the other in his hand and drank his drink as well.

"I'll be right back," she replied, giving the glass back to him and the next minute she was out of the door.


	7. Chapter Seven: Holding Back

**Chapter Seven: Holding Back**

"So she was the lawyer who won that trial for you?"

"Yes."

"Then why have you never mentioned her? And how come she knows so much about me?"

"We ran into each other last week and I invited her for a coffee and we talked."

"That's it?"

"What else do you want to hear?"

"She is a democrat."

"And?"

"You were accused of racism, and you are a member of the Tea Party. She still defended you?"

"That's her job."

"I'd love to get to know this woman better."

"I'm not sure that's a good idea. Besides she's a judge now, she has a different job."

"I'm not sure you're making sense now. Are you hiding something from me?"

"No."

"You'd better not," she said, threatening him playfully then gave him a small kiss, "I'm cold, can we go back, please?"

"Just give me five more minutes."

"You can freeze here for all I care, but don't get lost!" she smiled and left him alone with his thoughts.

He knew he'd made a mistake hiding the truth about Diane from her, but he hadn't had enough time to think it through. He hadn't been prepared for them to meet that night or ever. And he certainly hadn't been prepared for the effect Diane apparently still had on him. Seeing her that night brought back all those memories he'd thought to have buried deep inside him.

He drank out his drink, took a deep breath and decided to go back to his date when he spotted Diane coming out of the building. He hated her for wearing that dress that made her irresistible in his eyes. But he needed to talk to her before she talked to Lilian again. He had to prevent an awkward situation like the one before from happening once more.

"You're gonna get cold," he said as she got closer to him, but she obviously hadn't noticed him before, because she trembled a little hearing his voice.

"I have something to keep me warm," she said shrugging.

"But you could still catch a cold, we should go back inside, come on," he said and tried to take her arm, but she managed to avoid his hand by moving away quickly.

"You can't tell me what to do you know," she seemed a little angry and it actually surprised him, she had been different just a few minutes ago.

"I know, but…"

"And where is your girlfriend? We haven't finished that conversation."

He'd planned to tell her what he'd told Lilian about them, but she appeared to be a bit tipsy, so he figured it might be a better idea not to let the two of them meet again that night or ever.

"We're leaving."

"Fine, run away from me again, see if I care."

She raised her voice and as he looked into her eyes he saw that she was actually hurt. He didn't want to run away from her, he actually wanted to take her into his arms and kiss those lips, but he couldn't do that anymore.

"You can't do this to me," he didn't want to hurt her more, but he had to defend himself just a little, it was not only his fault that the evening turned out this way.

"Do what?"

"Once you want us to be friends, then you come here tonight and…"

"I had no idea you'd be here tonight," she cut him off and he knew she was right, but he still felt like blaming her just a little, after all she was the one who had put up that little act for Lilian, it had almost looked like she had been jealous.

"Who did you come with?"

He realised that he hadn't even thought of her being on the party with a date as well. Even though he had suggested dating to her the other day.

"With my date, why do you care?"

"Because I care, because you…" he didn't finish the sentence, because he couldn't take it any longer.

Maybe it was the drink he'd just had or her jealous and angry behaviour or the thought of her being on the party with another man, wearing that gorgeous dress. He was simply unable to hold himself back any longer, he had to kiss her.

And the minute their lips touched he forgot about the world around them.


	8. Chapter Eight: Who is Leaving?

**Chapter Eight: Who is Leaving?**

For a short moment it felt good to be in his arms again after all those years, but the kiss also kind of helped her come back to her senses, to realise how wrong their behaviour had been on so many levels. She broke it off and looked straight into his eyes.

"You don't have to leave. I'm leaving," she said and quickly walked away.

She felt better with each step she took and as her mind became clearer she started to regret her attitude that night. She had no right to be jealous of the other woman. She'd had her chance with him once, but it hadn't worked out. She should have let him try it with someone else. On the other hand he'd acted inconsistently as well. It had been him who had gone up to her on the party, he could have pretended they hadn't known each other.

Not to mention that he'd ruined everything with the kiss and dared to blame it on her. She'd just wanted to have a nice evening with Will. Had she known Kurt would have been there, she wouldn't have come. She'd wanted to believe they could have been just friends, but this evening proved her wrong. This clearly wasn't something for them. It might have worked for other couples, but their relationship hadn't been completely over. It had lasted too short and ended too suddenly. There were still unspoken words and feelings between them, not to mention the attraction that drew them into each other's arms again.

But he belonged to Lilian now and she didn't want to stand between them. She'd made a few mistakes that night, just like him, but no one would ever have to know about that kiss. They should pretend it never happened. Of course they should also forget about trying to be friends. They shouldn't be seeing each other at all. They should find a way to live their lives as they had in the last three years. He'd already found someone, she would try to do the same. He wasn't the only man in Chicago, he wasn't even the best for her. She decided to try harder, because it was obvious that she needed someone in her life.

She went back to the building to get her purse and her coat and Will was right there on her side at once.

"Are you leaving?"

"Yes, I'm sorry."

"Are you kidding me? I can't wait to get away from here. So where are we going?"

"I don't know about you, but I'm going home."

"To do what? Lick your wounds? I won't let that happen."

"Don't be ridiculous!"

"I mean it, Diane. Trust me on this. You don't want to be home alone tonight."

He was actually right. She didn't want to be alone that night. And she was indeed grateful for his presence. She decided to listen to him and let him take her wherever he wanted. That was what she needed, to get her mind off that other man. She'd have plenty of time to think about him later, until she'd finally be able to forget about him for once and for all.

o-o-o

He saw her leaving with Will and he was relieved to see that she was in good hands. She hadn't been there with a date after all. He had made a fool of himself and ruined the friendship between them with that kiss. Even if she had been the one provoking it, especially with her comment about him running away from her again. He couldn't get that sentence out of his head. It hadn't been _her_ he'd run away from, it had been his life. It had looked like she'd understood and made the choice not to go with him. Then why was she still upset about it?

Maybe it had been a mistake forcing this friendship when they still had issues hidden inside them. If that night had proved him on thing, it had been that he wasn't completely over her yet. She was seemingly lonely and it hurt him seeing her like that. She'd chosen her firm over him once, but now she didn't have the firm any more. She'd lost both of them and he'd come back to remind her of that. He should have stayed away, he hadn't thought of the consequences.

He looked at the woman sitting on his side. He'd lied to her and sort of cheated on her that night and now he was unable to tell her the truth, because that would have hurt her even more. She deserved better than him, but he didn't want to hurt her by leaving her either. He found himself in an impossible situation and he had no idea how to carry on.


	9. Chapter Nine:Mocktails and other Secrets

**Chapter Nine: Mocktails and other Secrets**

"So how is Sharon, for a partner? Is she better than me or worse? And don't forget, I might be a bit drunk, but I still know when you are lying," she chuckled and took a sip from her drink.

They were in a bar, both obviously overdressed for the place, but it didn't matter. They spent the night reminiscing about old times, making each other laugh. They hadn't been drinking together since her going away party that had been a year ago. She thought the friendship would have remained, but now that there wasn't a common firm to connect them it was different. But this night proved that they could still have fun spending time together and she didn't want the night to be over.

"She doesn't like _this_."

"What? Drinking?"

"Yep."

Diane had to laugh at the absurdity of this statement.

"I'm serious."

"Sorry, so what do you do when you celebrate or lose?"

"When we celebrate? I drink and she has these mocktails."

Diane almost chocked on her drink hearing the word.

"And when we lose, we draw the consequences and I drink alone."

"No wonder you miss me, everyone needs a drinking buddy."

"Well, I have Kalinda."

"Right. And what about Alicia?"

"What about her?"

"Are you still dancing around each other or you're finally getting to the next level?"

"I really don't want to talk about it. Why don't you tell me what happened in the garden tonight?"

"Cause I really don't want to talk about it."

For a short moment they shared an understanding smile with each other then Will broke the silence.

"Then tell me some secrets of the courthouse. Where do you play those secret poker games?"

"If I told you it wouldn't be a secret any more."

"You're such a tease. I told you something about Sharon, you have to tell me something in return."

"About who?"

"About anyone. How is your buddy, Judge Abernathy?"

"He's planning to adopt a child from Somalia."

"What?" he chuckled.

"He wanted to talk me into doing the same."

"I hope you said no."

"You bet I said no."

They both laughed, then after a short pause she finally said it out loud.

"I miss this…us."

"Me too, but you should be happy, you've achieved what could only be given to a few of us."

"Did you know that happiness means nothing when you have no one to share it with?"

"Since when you've become so philosophical?" he tried to joke, but she was still looking at him seriously.

"Come on, you can change that! You can find someone! You've been working your butt off your whole life. You've earned your prize, now it's time to think of yourself."

"I should have stayed where I was."

"No. You have to look ahead! Think of something you want for yourself. You can have anything you want."

"You're probably right, I must sound pathetic. I'm sorry I dragged you into this."

"It was my idea, remember?"

"But you must be regretting it already."

"I love spending time with you, we should do it more often."

"Liar!" she chuckled.

"Why would I lie? You know mocktails are really not my thing."

She laughed and he laughed along. They managed to find back to their old selves and for a short time Diane felt as if nothing had changed. She would get back to fighting against loneliness tomorrow, but that night she didn't want to think about it any more.

She rose her glass.

"To alcohol, one of the best things in the world," she chuckled.

"And to friendship, another one of the best things in the world."

They smiled at each other and Diane knew Will was someone she could always count on.


	10. Chapter Ten: The Last Time

**Chapter Ten: The Last Time**

She was holding on to her coffee mug, waiting for the effect of the caffeine and the aspirin she'd taken to finally kick in. Her terrible headache had been mainly caused by the previous night they'd spent drinking with Will, but something else had also contributed to it. A voicemail on her cell phone from 2am. She'd already listened to it twice, but she still had trouble figuring out the meaning of the message. Only one thing was clear to her, that the man who'd left it wanted to meet her that afternoon, and she had no idea what to do.

She could think of several issues they should have talked about, that had bothered her last night and she had been unable to hide them under the influence of the alcohol. She still hated herself for sort of having given away her feelings and that those feelings still existed. And now that she realised what she felt, she had to do everything to hide it again. With their past there was no use pretending they could be just friends. It was all or nothing, and since he was in a relationship she had to be the one breaking it off completely. Talking about those issues would just complicate everything. They had to stop seeing each other for once and for all.

But to tell him this she had to agree to that meeting he'd suggested. It didn't matter what he'd planned to tell her, she would be the one leading the conversation and make sure to do what would be the best for both of them. She would move on, she would find someone to make her life complete. She was determined. It was time for another change in her life that would hopefully bring her back the feeling of satisfaction.

She typed a message saying she'd be there and she wasn't uncertain any more. She felt in control of her life again and she would make sure not to let it out of her hands any more.

o-o-o

He was the one arriving first this time and he chose the same table they'd been sitting at the other week. He wanted to apologize and wanted to suggest to talk about what had happened three years ago. They had been ignoring the topic and it had clearly kept them from having an honest relationship. He couldn't really explain why, but he loved having her back in his life. She obviously still meant a lot to him and he would have hated to lose her again so quickly. Besides he still had this firm belief that she kind of needed him, so he was determined to solve this awkward situation between them.

But he had no chance to actually tell her why he'd wanted them to meet, because she started to talk right after she sat down in front of him.

"I can't stay long, I just wanted to tell you this in person. We can't meet again, this is the last time and I mean it. I know it was my idea and it was nice of you to support it, but it obviously isn't working this way."

"Will you let me say a few things as well or do you plan to keep your speech and simply leave me here?"

He interrupted, because he didn't like how she'd apparently made decisions on her own that affected both of them.

"This is not up to discussion, I can't do this any more, so I won't see you again, it's this simple."

"Since when do you prefer choosing the easy way?" he tried to distract her again, but she didn't even seem to pay attention to his question.

"I'm just someone from your past, you have to live in the present. You don't need to be friends with me, I just complicate your life, don't you see it?"

"Let that be my problem! I know last night was a disaster, but we won't let that happen again."

"But it has already happened."

"I'm sorry, ok? I'm sorry for surprising you, for forcing our company on you. And I'm sorry for losing control. I shouldn't have kissed you, that was a mistake. And I'm sorry that I went away like that three years ago. I just couldn't stay. It wasn't your fault."

He finally said it out loud and her eyes suggested that she appreciated his apology.

"I know it wasn't and I understood, but we really can't pretend like nothing ever happened. Have you told Lilian about us?"

"No."

"Why? Why are you keeping it from her? You can't base a relationship on lies. That's not you."

"I know, I just got confused, last night happened so suddenly."

"Kurt, listen to me. What we had back then was something special, but it belongs to the past. And we can't move on if we keep reminding each other of what used to be. You've found someone who doesn't deserve to be treated like this."

"I know."

"I'm just in your way."

"Don't say that."

"I have to go," she said firmly and stood up.

"Diane, please, stay! At least for a coffee."

"I can't," she replied and quickly walked out of the shop.


	11. Chapter Eleven: Unvoiced Feelings

**Chapter Eleven: Unvoiced Feelings**

He didn't have to think about what she'd said too long to understand what she hadn't. It was pretty simple. She hadn't wanted them to stay friends, because she still looked at him some other way. She'd just chosen to end everything between them because of Lilian. If he hadn't had someone else she might have given them another chance. He loved having her back in his life, just like he loved having his old life back again. He'd left because he'd wanted to leave this all behind and she'd stayed because her place had been there. But she'd already given up on her firm, the only reason she'd named when she'd rejected him three years ago.

He suddenly felt the decision in his own hands. With Lilian everything had been so simple from the very beginning, while with Diane it had always been complicated. But he liked complicated, if nothing but his job proved that perfectly. Diane and him were similar in so many respects and maybe the reason he hadn't fallen in love with Lilian yet could have been that he had never really stopped loving Diane. He knew she'd felt the same way back then, they'd simply had bad timing and those words had never been said between them.

Diane wasn't the same any more, he felt that they'd gotten closer to each other in the last days than ever before. They had never talked so openly back then. The focus had always been on the attraction and that hadn't been enough to keep them together in a crisis. But it wasn't too late to finally talk about those feelings, bring them up to the surface again. It shouldn't have ended so suddenly, but it had been the only solution he'd seen back then. And he'd never planned to come back ever again, but he still had and she was still there.

He didn't want to fool himself that she'd waited for him, but it was a fact that she was still alone, waiting for someone. They were both on the same place again, wanted the same thing. Three years ago he'd wanted to be with her somewhere else, but she hadn't wanted to leave. Now he wanted to stay in Chicago, but forget about her being there? It just didn't make sense. What they hadn't been allowed to have three years ago, they could have now. He just had to make a decision and ask her before it would really have been too late.

But he had to talk to Lilian first. Tell her all about Diane and explain why he had to break this off with her now. He knew she would be hurt, alone by the fact that he'd lied to her. And even if he managed to settle this with her peacefully there would be no guarantee that Diane would actually take him back. Maybe he had misunderstood the signs, the unspoken words. But it was a risk he had to take. Their relationship with Lilian wouldn't have been the same any more either way and if Diane rejected him again, he would know what to do. Leave this city again, but this time forever.

o-o-o

She'd done what she had to do. She'd stepped aside so he could be happy with someone else. It had been the right thing to do, but it still hurt her. It had also been her fault that he ended on the side of another woman. Three years ago she could have told him to stay with her or just that she'd have been there if he had changed his mind. But she'd never been the one to give out her feelings so easily. It was no wonder she was still alone, and now that she didn't even have her firm, she felt lonelier than ever.

He'd come back to her life at a moment, when she'd been vulnerable enough not to send him away at once. She'd tried to think of him as a friend, to be thankful for him for having been there for her, but it hadn't been enough. She needed more and he couldn't give her more. But now that he'd made her realise what had been missing from her life she was ready for a change, to let someone in, someone who would hopefully stay.


	12. Chapter Twelve: Too Late

**Chapter Twelve: Too Late**

"Excuse me, Miss Lockhart?"

Diane looked up from the paper she'd been reading to face someone she recognized immediately, even though she'd only seen her once before.

"Miss Parker," she said and tried to hide her insecurity behind a smile.

"I'm sorry to disturb you, I just…may I sit down for a minute?"

"Please," she pointed in the direction of the other chair, but it bothered her that she had no idea what the woman wanted from her.

"I know it's not exactly appropriate for me to do this, now that you and Kurt are back together, but I saw you and I thought…"

Diane was startled to hear her words. She'd managed to get her mind off him in the last weeks, she almost started dating already. Will casually introduced her to one of his friends and even though she saw the reason behind that she still considered going out with the guy.

"Me and Kurt? I haven't seen Kurt in a month."

"He hasn't gone back to you?"

"Back to me? Why would he have come back to me?"

"Because of what he'd told me about you, the evening after that party."

"He told you about me?"

The evening after the party had been after their meeting in the coffee shop. She was glad he'd made the right decision, but apparently he wasn't with Lilian any more, which surprised her. She'd thought she'd done him a favour, helping him to go the right way.

"Yes and I have to say I got pretty angry, there's nothing I hate more than a man lying to me. I told him I never wanted to see him again. But then I saw you and I've done some thinking in the last month and calling him would be awkward. I'm sorry, this was a bad idea. I should go."

"I…I really don't know what to say. Except that if you want to tell him something, call him. Maybe you can work this out, it's not too late yet."

This was the advice she should have given to herself as well when she'd let him go three years ago. Maybe they could have still worked it out a few weeks later, but it had been three years.

"He was pretty determined, he wanted to break up, I thought you were the reason."

"And you are not angry with me?"

"The man travelled around the continent for three years, because he had no idea what he wanted from life any more, it's not your fault that he still hasn't found the answer."

Diane had to smile at this remark. Lilian seemed to know Kurt quite well.

"Looks like he will find the answer somewhere else. You haven't seen him since then either?"

"No, and like I said I didn't have the courage to call him, I thought you could tell him for me that I understand and I wish him to be happy. God I sound pathetic. I'm really sorry I bothered you."

"It's ok, I understand. You should consider calling him. He is not with me, so there's a good chance he wouldn't mind if you two talked about it again, under calmer circumstances."

"If one of us should call him, that's you. The way he talked about you, I had the feeling he was still in love with you."

Diane wasn't ready to hear this from her mouth. Her words confused her and she had no idea what to answer.

"I should really go now, but I hope you two will find a way to work this out. You don't have to worry about me, telling these to you already helped, I think it helps me move on, it's time."

Lilian got up and Diane still didn't find the right words to say.

"Thank you," she said finally and smiled at the woman, who waved her goodbye and left.

She was more confused than ever. Kurt had left Lilian the same day she'd told him they shouldn't meet again. Where had he been in the last month? Had she really been the reason why he'd broken up with Lilian? Then why hadn't she heard from him ever since? Had he gone away again?

She had so many questions and she could have just picked up the phone and asked him, but she didn't do it. A month ago she had told him that had been the last time they'd talked, she'd told him she'd belonged to his past. Of course she had only said those things because he had been with someone else. And if it hadn't been for Lilian she would still have thought they lived together happily. It made a difference that she knew the truth, but maybe he had broken up with her so he could have gone away again and if that had been his decision she had no right to keep him back.


	13. Chapter Thirteen: Giving Answers

**Chapter Thirteen: Giving Answers**

She spotted him right after she'd entered the place and her first reaction was joy to finally see him again. She had almost given up on him still being in Chicago. She'd tried to find out if he had been involved in any cases in court, but she'd found none. But she'd stuck to her decision and hadn't called him. A week had gone by with no signs of him again, it had been too long, but while during the previous weeks she'd thought to have known that it had been over between them, the talk with Lilian had confused her again. She'd started having visions of him, she'd been looking for him everywhere. She had no idea how long she could have been going on like that, but she didn't have to wonder any more.

After she'd made sure it wasn't just a vision again she walked up to his table without hesitation.

"Are you waiting for someone?" she asked without saying hello, when she saw there was nothing on the table in front of him.

"You."

"Me?" she couldn't help chuckling hearing him say it so casually.

"Will you sit down, please?"

"Sure," she said, because she had no reason to say no. She felt like she had nothing to lose.

"Would you like to order something?"

"Am I staying long enough?"

"I hope so."

"Then, I'd like to have the cake we ate the other day, it was delicious," she smiled at him.

Maybe she should have been angry with him instead of so playful and casual, but she couldn't help it. For a whole week she had been asking herself if she'd done the right thing not calling him, it was time to get to know the answer.

After they'd placed their orders there were some moments of silence and she probably should have waited for him to start the conversation, but she was tired of waiting any longer.

"How did you know I would be here today?"

"I saw you here a couple of times in the last weeks, you seem to love this place."

"I do, their cake is yummy," she said chuckling, "But were you spying on me?"

"No, I just come this way very often. I had seen you here before, before we first met here. That was when I decided to call you."

"And what if I hadn't come here today?"

"I would have gone to your office or to your home."

"Why today? It's been more than five weeks?"

"I broke up with Lilian."

"I know."

"You know?"

"I decided to try out a new place last week and she came up to me. She was nice, but I don't think I'll ever go there again."

"She was nice? Last time I saw her, she was furious!"

"Of course she was and she had every reason to."

"I know, but…" he was interrupted by the waitress and when she was gone they stayed in silence again for a while drinking their coffees.

"Why today?"

She repeated the question to pick up the conversation again.

"I can't tell you that yet, but I assure you that I have a good reason."

She didn't like when he played with her, but she chose to accept this reply and stopped wondering about the importance of that day.

"Okay. So where have you been or is that a secret too?"

"I was here, working, spying on you," he added chuckling, "Waiting for the right moment."

"You should have called me."

"I needed time, we needed time. Besides you were the one telling me I have to forget about the past, but I chose to forget about the present instead."

"I won't take the blame for this, I had no choice. You were with someone else."

"And I needed time to be free again emotionally. If I learnt one thing during the last three years it was that I shouldn't rush things. It took me almost three years to finally get back to the life I love and exactly three years to get back to the woman I love."

"Are you talking about me?" she asked with a teasing smile, blushing a little.

"I am," he said softly and gently placed his right hand on her left hand, "I love you, Diane. It might have taken me three years to say it out loud, but at least you can be sure that I mean it."

It had been too long since the last time she'd heard a confession like that. She had rarely given men enough time to fall in love with her. But with him it had been different. They had been in each other's lives long enough for this to happen.

"I love you too. And you can be sure that I mean it, because I never talk about my feelings in coffee shops," she suppressed the urge to chuckle, she wanted him to take her words seriously.

"Let's get out of here," he said taking her hand in his and pulling it softly.

"I'm not going anywhere until I finish my cake," she said chuckling this time, "Do you want a piece?"

"No, I love watching you eat," he said smiling and placed a kiss in her palm, before putting it back on the table, but he kept on holding it while she finished the dessert.

"Where's your car?" he asked when they left the shop.

"In the parking lot at the courthouse."

"You won't need it today."

"What? Are you planning on kidnapping a sitting judge?"

"No, I just want to take _Your Honour_ somewhere with my car, if I may."

"You may," she said softly.

In the state she was in, she would have followed him anywhere he wanted to go. But she was surprised that they went on an all too familiar way and ended up parking in front of her own house.

"You wanted to take me home?" she said a bit disappointed as he started getting out of the car.

"Yes," he said, then came to her side to open the door for her.

"I don't understand. You brought me home? Why? And don't think I have forgotten that you still haven't told me why today is so important."

"I could never underestimate you," he replied while she took out her keys to let them in.

"Are you coming inside?"

"If I may."

"You are such a gentleman today, you haven't even…"

She couldn't finish the sentence because right after he closed the door behind him he pulled her in for a kiss.

"Kissed me yet," she finished the sentence smiling against his lips.

Then he helped her out of her coat and after placing both coats on the rack he pulled her inside the living room.

"Exactly three years ago today," he started when they were both sitting on her couch, "I walked out of your life, because you didn't want to come away with me."

"I…" she couldn't say anything more because he gently placed a finger on her lips to prevent her from talking.

"I brought you home today to tell you right here that now I'm ready to accept your home or any home _you_ choose as my home. I've understood that it doesn't matter where you are, it only matters who you are with. And you are the person I want to share my life with, wherever we are."

She was truly touched by his statement and answered the only way she could. She folded her arms around his neck and kissed him softly. It was the most wonderful thing anyone has ever said to her and she wanted to show him without words that she had no objections. She wanted the same thing, to share her life with him, as long as they loved.

* * *

><p><strong>Note:<strong> I know it was a little cheesy, I'm sorry about that. But it's not the end of the story yet, since Trins xxx so kindly requested that I write more Will into the story, I came up with some kind of an epilogue that I will post soon.


	14. Epilogue One: No Words

**A/N: I have been hiding two epilogues of this fic all this time (I know, I'm so mean :P ), but I decided to publish them tonight. This is the first epilogue that comes right after ch13. It's M rated, because of sexual content.**

* * *

><p><strong>Epilogue One: No Words<strong>

Her lips tasted the same way, her kisses were as sweet as before. Three years might have gone by, but nothing has changed. Kissing each other used to be their passion and it felt good reliving the past again, that was their present and their future as well.

For a few minutes he didn't do anything, just let her kiss him as often as she wanted and she couldn't get enough of those kisses. He felt that they had to make up for all those missed opportunities of the past years, they were tasting each other again and again, like there was no tomorrow.

But when her hands started to dig into his hair, stroking it with desire he couldn't hold himself back any more, he wanted to touch her as well. He folded his arms around her waist and started pulling her closer to him, lifting her a bit and turning, until she ended up sitting in his lap with both her legs on his left side. He pulled her as close as he could, taking pleasure in running his hands all over her back. He found the opener of her dress, but he decided to ignore it and his hands wandered to her hair that he used to love stroking so much and he knew she wouldn't mind.

Then his hands continued backwards, but didn't stop at her waist. His left hand reached for her thigh and he ran his palms along her right leg. He felt that his touch made her shiver even through the fabric of the dress and her stockings. As he reached her shoes, he took them off and they fell on the ground one by one.

He placed his left hand under her thighs, his right hand on her back and tried to lift her up and stand up with her. When she realised what he was about to do, she tried to protest with freeing her legs and pushing him backwards, which resulted in her body lying on his on the couch. She gave him a victorious smile and he immediately pulled her head towards his to kiss her.

He tried to sit up, but she wouldn't let him and the only way he could have gained his control back was to roll, but that would have resulted in both of them hitting the ground and he didn't want to hurt her. So he decided to accept the current situation and his hands were back on her body again.

When he found the opener of her dress, he chose to ignore it once more, instead his hands found back to her thighs and he started rolling up her skirt. His touches made her squirm and she replied with lifting her head and looking curiously into his eyes. He used her moment of insecurity to sit up again, pulling her back in his lap, then he tried to lift her again as before and this time she didn't protest. She folded her arms around his neck and he carried her up the stairs, straight into the bedroom.

As they entered the room he gently put her down on her feet and as if the approximately one minute their lips had spent apart would have been much longer, they united again, kissing each other even more eagerly this time. But apart from the intensity of their kisses, they didn't seem to rush to the next level, they knew they had all the time in the world. After all these years, time seemed to have stopped for them that night. He was holding her as close as possible, feeling her heat and he could have stayed that way forever, with her body in his arms and her kisses on his lips.

It was again her who broke their harmony, with moving her hands from around his neck, on to his chest. And she only had to open one button on his shirt to set his desire on fire again. He didn't hesitate this time, his hands landed right on the opener of her dress and as she unbuttoned his shirt step by step, he pulled down the zipper of her dress.

He had to let go off her, so she could rid him off his shirt, but with the same move, he pulled her dress with him, freeing her shoulders from the fabric. When his shirt was on the ground, his hands found back to her dress, pulling it gently off her, but her arms were still in the way. His lips then left hers, because they couldn't resist moving on to her shoulders, they were irresistible. He tried to get rid of her dress while kissing her, but her hands were reaching for his undershirt, rolling it up on his body. He understood why she chose not to let her dress fall just yet and to let her know he agreed, he kissed her on the lips again. She was still grabbing her undershirt and when the kiss ended she took it off him.

But instead of closing the deal, she chose to keep her dress on for another while and started kissing his bare chest instead. He didn't mind feeling her lips on him, but he wanted to do the same to her, to get rid of her dress and that other tiny piece of clothing underneath, so that his lips could start their journey on her body. He wanted to be the one to pamper her, to show her how much he'd missed her, to give her back what he'd taken away.

He reached out for her chin, his hands slowly forcing her to look up to him again, then he bent down to kiss her lips, while his hands gently started to pull her dress off. She gave in and her dress fell on the ground between them. Then he softly touched her waist and started rolling her stockings down, then his hands went back on her waist and he lifted her a little, just to make her sit down on the side of the bed.

He managed to separate his lips from hers and he carefully started to roll off her stockings, leaving kisses on both her legs along the way. When he was done he looked into her eyes, just to see them focus on something else. He understood the meaning of where those eyes looked. They both had gotten rid of two peaces of clothing already, it was his turn again.

He reached for the button of his pants, but her hands followed his just a second later, stopping them from what they were about to do. He looked into her eyes again and couldn't resist bending down to kiss her. Her hands then left his and she put them around his neck, while lying back on the bed, pulling his body with hers. And before he could notice what she was about to do, she pushed him a little aside and rolled over him. As their lips parted a small chuckle escaped from her lips and this only made him more eager. He rushed to stop her lips from wasting time on anything else.

His hands started wandering on her back and they quickly found the opener of her bra. Forgetting about whose turn it actually was to get rid of another piece of clothing. He tried to open her bra quickly, but she stopped him by separating her lips from his, reminding him of their unspoken deal. She managed to get on her knees, distancing her bust from his, then her lips started to wonder from his lips to his neck, onto his chest, leaving kisses all over his upper body. He wanted to pull her back, but he was unable to move his hands.

When she got to the waistline of his jeans, she unbuttoned and unzipped them and he managed to lift his hips to help her pull them off him, getting rid of his shoes and socks at the same time. And with that he knew he finally earned what he'd been longing for so long, but their lips had been apart for too long for him to resist kissing her again. He sat up and pulled her in his lap, with her legs on both sides of his. His fingers dived into her blonde locks and he pulled her face towards his. She folded her arms around his neck and they were just kissing each other again and again. Then he grabbed her thighs with his hands, trying to stand up, and folded her legs around his waist. He stood up, holding her in his arms and turned around to place her on the middle of the bed.

He knew they wouldn't hold much longer without the final satisfaction, but he still owed her something else before and he knew she longed for that as well, because her hands left his neck and reached for his hands showing them the way towards her back. She put her elbows on the bed to lift up her body and he finally opened her bra and quickly removed it from his way. She separated her lips from his and she gave him permission with her eyes as well. He kissed her shortly on the lips again, then continued kissing her neck and finally reached her chest, leaving kisses all over it.

He heard a few moans escape from her lips and he soon tried to suppress them with real kisses. The desire to finally utterly have her started to get unbearable and he knew that she felt the same way. Their hands simultaneously made their ways towards the last piece of clothing of the other, to make it happen at last. She let him inside her, like she had done many times before, but this time he saw something different in her eyes. They reflected those feelings she'd confessed to him and he made sure to show her he felt the same way.

They didn't need words, their bodies still knew each other as well as ever, but before they reached that certain point he whispered those three words in her ears again. Then he looked into her eyes and she tried to answer, though she only managed to form the words with her mouth. But he understood and made sure to kiss her one last time to seal their newly formed unity.


	15. Epilogue Two: Best Man

**I'm dedicatiing this epilogue to Trins xxx, who asked for more D/W in the story. I hope you'll all like it though. ;)**

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><p><strong>Epilogue Two: Best Man<strong>

She was in the same coffee-shop again. It had become her favorite place in the last weeks. She and Kurt often met there during the day and these meetings kind of held a special importance in their life. But she was sitting with someone else there that afternoon, someone she also met there regularly, ever since that night out drinking after that disastrous event. They'd started to really bond again, just like in the old days, when they'd run a firm together.

"I met Brad the other day. He is really sorry he missed out on you."

Brad was the friend of Will's she had almost considered dating before they'd made up with Kurt. It was the first time Will brought up the subject, he had seemed really happy when she'd told her she wouldn't have needed his matchmaking abilities anymore.

"Is he? I'm sure he'll find someone else in no time."

"You seem happy," he said after a short pause, his words accompanied by a smile.

"I am happy," she admitted the obvious. It was true that she hadn't felt this way too often in her life.

"And I'm happy for you," he replied in all honesty and she was grateful for his words.

"And what about you? My love life is basically an open book for you now, but I still haven't met that mysterious lady."

"I just really want to make sure that I don't screw it up this time. Just once in my life I want to do this right, maybe she is the one, but I don't want to jinx it."

"I understand."

"Let's talk about something else. For example that case that you resigned from, just because the defendant was represented by me."

"I know you too well, it wouldn't have been wise."

"And here I was thinking you would have a soft spot for me," he said with faked disappointment.

"In your dreams councilor," she said chuckling and he laughed along.

"Looks like you two are having a great time," she heard Kurt's voice and her laughter turned into a wide smile, "Will, hello," he greeted the other man, but without waiting for his reply he already bent down to place a kiss on her lips.

She sent a quick gaze in Will's direction while Kurt sat down next to her and the smile on his face gave her a comforting feeling.

"Hello," Will replied finally, "We were just talking about you," he lied and Diane couldn't help rolling her eyes.

"Really? Should I leave so you can continue?"

"Oh no, actually I was just telling Diane that I'd gladly offer my services as the best man in case you two decide to get married."

Rolling her eyes was apparently not enough, she actually had to kick Will a little under the table, which earned her a grin from him.

"That's really kind of you, but I don't think anyone could make this woman give up her freedom."

"Who knows? I have never seen her so happy."

They were still just teasing, but Diane couldn't help taking their words just a little seriously, so she had to interfere.

"Will you two please stop talking about me as if I wasn't here?"

"I'm sorry," Kurt replied first with clear regret in his voice.

"Me too," Will joined in, "In fact I have no more time to plan your wedding, because I'm already late."

"Then you should go," Diane said with a smile and decided to ignore the hint and encourage him to leave as soon as possible, before he put the idea into Kurt's head for real.

"Thank you for holding on to my company so much," he replied with a smile as he stood up from his seat.

"See you next week," she said, smiling at him.

"I would be a perfect best man, just saying," he added playfully, but he was gone the next moment before she could react in any way.

It was nothing more than teasing, but she still couldn't help feeling a little uncomfortable as she turned to Kurt. She had no idea how all this affected him. He had already proposed to her once and she had rejected him. They had only been together again for a few weeks and the subject of the proposal in the past hadn't come up yet. She wasn't sure how he felt about it or if he would ever try to propose to her again, just like she wasn't sure what she would answer if he would. She decided that this could be a chance to find out how he felt about that possibility, because it was better to know what to expect.

"I'm sorry for this, I swear we didn't talk about you or any wedding."

"I know, don't worry, I understood the signs just fine," he replied, but his reply only confused her even more. She wasn't sure if he was talking about the signs that Will had just been teasing them, or the signs that she hadn't liked what he had been insinuating.

"I mean we have only been together for a few weeks, why would I even think of marriage?"

"Diane, I said don't worry, I don't have an engagement ring in my pocket," he said playfully and he managed to calm her down at once with his tone. In fact she decided to play along and rid the conversation from the seriousness it might have gained.

"You don't? I thought you carry it with yourself all the time waiting for the right moment," she replied teasing and had to hold her breath as he actually reached inside his jacket, but then took out his hand empty.

"No, sorry," he chuckled and she was finally able to laugh along, "But I make no promises," he added and leaned forward to kiss her.

She didn't want to think about it anymore, so she just tossed all thoughts about the engagement, the best man and the marriage aside in her mind. She wanted to be with this man, she'd never been so happy with anyone else before and that was all that mattered. And somehow she had a feeling that if he ever proposed to her for real, she would surely have the right answer.


	16. Epilogue Three: The Biggest Step

**A/N: And this is supposed to be the chapter ending this fic, so it comes after 'Best Man' the original epilogue I posted back then. I'm sorry for the confusion and I hope you can still enjoy these additions to the story.**

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><p><strong>Epilogue Three: The Biggest Step<strong>

"What am I doing? No, I mean really, what am I doing?" Diane asked turning away from the mirror, shifting her look from one woman to the other.

"You're getting married," replied the elderly lady calmly, despite the anxious tone of the questions.

"But in my age! It's ridiculous."

"Sweetie, when I was in your age I was about to marry my fourth husband and I just buried husband number five. You're way behind me," she chuckled.

"Granny, not everyone is such a man-eater as you," the youngest woman interfered.

"You want to take after her? 35 years old and still single. What are you waiting for?"

"Maybe I'll wait as long as Diane did," she replied, looking proudly at the bride.

"I never wanted to get married," Diane stated still nervously.

"Stop encouraging her to follow your lead. You are not exactly setting the best example. But I guess better late than never. Even though, a republican? If your father was still alive, he would surely express his displeasure on this matter."

"But he is so handsome!" said her granddaughter, Mara enthusiastically.

"I know, that's why I've overlooked that tiny mistake and gave her my blessing, as I am her closest living relative."

"Not that she needed your blessing," said the young woman chuckling.

"Be careful what you say, young lady," her granny threatened her playfully.

"Yeah, your father can tell you stories about how Aunt Diane had tested your mother before she let him in the family," Diane said chuckling, forgetting about the importance of that day for a short moment.

"And my mother, your grandmother did the same with your mother. Richard used to come to me for support," Aunt Diane addressed her niece, who got her name after her.

"Then why did you end up doing the same to mom?" asked her granddaughter.

"You'll know once you get there, but at this speed, you'll never get there."

"Can we please focus on me? It's my wedding day," Diane already sounded much calmer.

"Didn't you just say that marrying in your age is ridiculous?" her aunt asked.

"Well, thank you."

"You look beautiful, Diane. I hope I'll look half as good in your age," Mara said with admiration.

"I don't get how you two got so close. You're barely related," said the older Diane.

"She's the daughter of my cousin, she's like the niece I never had," said Diane gently hugging the young woman.

"There must be something wrong with you, since when you've become so emotional?"

"Since she's in love," her granddaughter said smiling.

"In her age? It's ridiculous!" said the old lady rolling her eyes and the other two started laughing, when someone knocked on the door.

"Diane?"

"Yes?" replied the two Dianes at the same time, then the younger added, "I'm pretty sure he meant me."

"Kurt would like to know if you are ready."

"He is handsome too," Mara said smiling, referring to Will.

"And he is still single, could be someone for you," her grandmother winked.

"But granny…"

"Just a minute," Diane answered Will then looked into the mirror again. She was wearing a crème dress with a tight top and a narrowing skirt that ended at her ankles. Her hair was held up in a bun, except for some mops that surrounded her face. Her age showed on her face and on her hands, but she felt young inside. She'd never thought this day would ever come, but she was about to do something that would change her life forever.

She still had doubts, but she knew those would disappear the minute she looked into his eyes again. He was the most kind, patient and good hearted man she'd ever met. If it had been her destiny to marry someone, she couldn't have chosen better. It had been in the air from that day in the coffee shop when they'd finally said those magical three words. They both had known this time it would have been something to last. A year later he'd asked her if she'd wanted to marry him and after such a happy year they'd spent together, she'd had no reason to say no.

She lifted her wedding bouquet and smelled the crème roses. They matched with her dress perfectly and she knew she didn't need anything more. After the simple ceremony they would go away for a week, to make up for the missed chances of the past. Then they would continue their life together as before. Would they really stay together was the question of the future, but that day, she was going to take the biggest step towards a man in her life and she intended to have no regrets afterwards.


End file.
